The First Baby Carseataphobia

I've been told by the religious community that watching the birth of a child is like watching a goddess ride toward you on a unicorn that's on a rainbow that's on a cloud, but I can tell you from firsthand experience that it's actually fairly disgusting. Fortunately, caring for a baby is fundamentally the easiest thing you can do. Just make sure he or she doesn't conk their head on anything, feed them, don't let them roll around in their own filth, and most importantly: get the car seat right!

Car seats, when viewed in the store, are absolutely magnificent pieces of hardware. Shiny, intricate, seemingly adapted perfectly to the body of a miniature human. Once purchased they are revealed to be, in their own way, torture implements not designed to fit exceptionally well in anything less than a Peterbuilt. The straps that handily slip into the bars under your seat are not long enough, so in order to get it in your car you have to plop it onto the seat, stand on it holding a dumbbell and pray that you're able to get it to click in. And the tie into the back of the seat is done by stretching the hook over the frame of your car and pulling on the straps as if raising the mast of a clipper ship. Once that's all accomplished and the seat is not moving to the point of feeling set in concrete – that's when the baby problems occur.

Is your baby not shaped to factory design? Mine wasn't. Between the issues of cheek size and paranoia it took 30 minutes to put him into his seat the first time, granted there were two potty breaks needed over that time. For whatever reason my child enjoyed throwing his head into the seat strap and crying upon each attempt. And once he was in loosely, I played the "are the straps tight enough yet" game with myself. Tightening one millimeter of strap per attempt, backing off two millimeters upon baby being uncomfortable, that was usually diaper related it turns out.

The good news is that babies only have baby-sized problems like car seat fitting and burping, and that there's a large baby-related industry constantly designing better car seats. With practice and the realization that you're going to be inefficient a baby's first car seating can be the first of many enriching adventures you will have with your child.…

Emetophobia and Children

Emetophobia is the fear of vomit and vomiting. It is the fifth most common phobia out there, but one of the least talked about. Living with Emetophobia is hard enough, but combining Emetophobia and children is a guarantee that an emetophobe will face his or her fears.

One of the hardest things that individuals with Emetophobia face is dealing with a loved one being ill. It is especially hard for female emetophobes when they are forced to take care of their own children. Women with Emetophobia may even choose not to have children because of their fears of getting morning sickness and throwing up or the fear that their child will get sick and they will be the only one able to take care of this child.

I knew that eventually my daughter would be sick. I tried so hard not to think about it and just figured that I would somehow be able to handle my Emetophobia when it came time to take care of an ill child.

One of the worst places for an Emetophobia attack to occur is in a car. There is no escape. So when my daughter became ill, in an hour away from my house I was amazed that I did not lose it. My husband was driving, I was in the passenger seat, and my daughter was in the back seat.

She had been a little out of sorts all weekend, but I did not think she would be sick. I didn't even hear it happen, but my husband heard her throw up. I initially figured it would be no big deal and was just spit up, but I was wrong. The whole cup of applesauce I had given her was all over her shirt. She was visibly upset.

We were pretty much in the middle of nowhere so my husband pulled over on a dirt road. He kept saying he didn't know what to do. He seemed to be the one having the panic attack, not me. My Emetophobia hadn't even kicked in, or if it had mom mode trumped it. I was not in a panic.

I got out of the passengers side, opened her car door, and cleaned her up with her pink stroller blanket. I had vomit on my hands and I still wasn't panicking. I stuffed the blanket in a plastic bag, tied it up and put it on the floor in the back seat.

I got back into the passengers seat and fantasized about some Purell and Clorox wipe ups. I told my husband to get on the freeway and drive to the next exit. I was still pretty calm, no fast heartbeats, no panic or crazy thoughts that I might get sick.

We got to the first rest stop about ten minutes later. I was originally going to take her in and clean her up, but she was sleeping, and I didn't want to disturb her. I simply went in, cleaned my hands with a lot of zest, got back into the car and we drove home.

I was pretty proud of myself. I was also lucky that she threw up that one time and never again.

I had always heard emetophobes can handle their own children being sick. I am just happy that when faced with an ill child myself I was able to handle it with ease and not fall into the traditional Emetophobia panic attack.

I am also happy to report that I did not have any fears of getting sick or whatever bug my daughter had after her vomiting incident. Another side …


Sadness is an island that I visit when my life permits
Indulging in parole before your minions see that I have gone
Hurried steps on waning pavement bring me down to water’s edge….
There I take a shoddy boat and set out for a place to mourn

Even on that phantom rock where waves lash out to touch my feet
I feel your eyes awaken like an itch demanding cool remission
Beaming down obsessively, igniting flames upon my neck
Followed by a brutish voice that mocks me in my fetal state

Judgment crashes through the ceiling, crippling what I thought was sky
Once again unwelcome phrases filter in to weigh me down
Scorn has rediscovered me, a satellite that never dies
Pity from the outside growing thinner with each secret sold

Where can this well rattled soul escape your ever burning gaze…
And find a place too deep or high to lose my poltergeist behind?
You dry my tears without consent, then stand me on my feet to fall
I curse your quiet laughter when my back is turned to tilted ears

Where can these frustrated fists unfold to make two praying hands
When a small black cloud pursues me even through a great cathedral’s hall?
Ones that cupped their hands around my innocence now predisposed
Dirt that I had kicked in spite now lies beneath my bended knee

I watch your figure rise behind me as I kneel to splash my face
Your statuesque expression pours disgust around my shattered will
A ceremony follows to divide me from your kingdom kin
You play the circling buzzard while I play the tortoise on its back…

Social Phobia and Children

You would be surprised at how many children actually have social phobia and their parents have no idea. Some of the symptoms that you will want to look for if you suspect your child may have this problem are shaky hands when they are approached by someone, sweating heavily and blushing when in large groups. They will also tend to shy away from crowds and not be very talkative. You can also talk with your child and ask them how they feel when they are approached by someone.

Of course some symptoms will vary from person to person. If thy respond by saying they feel afraid or begin to have abdominal pain or even if their mouth begins to get dry they may have social phobia. The good news about phobic disorders is that most people respond very well to treatment. They will eventually need to learn how to reduce their anxiety and face the social setting that they are afraid of. The sooner that parents find out about this problem, the easier it will be to deal with. If your child's problem is not dealt with they may begin to experience poor performance in school, and other areas, all because they are afraid.

There are several things that you may be able to do to help your child. First you should instruct them to practice breathing slowly from the diaphragm, this will help to reduce the intensity of their symptoms. It can also be helpful for your child to do regular exercise and muscle relaxation. There are even classes that you can sign your child up for that will help them to relax. Also make sure that they are getting enough rest, and eating right. An in-proper diet can add to the phobia. With your help and practice your child's self-confidence will increase and they will be better prepared to enter the social situation they fear.

When it comes to your child's social phobia they are usually fueled by their own thoughts. Many experts have stated that social phobia is a fear of disapproval. They always seem to think that someone is making fun of them or thinking something negative about them. In order to really help your child you have to understand the problem that they are going through. Your child needs to understand that what others say and think does not matter. By attaching to much meaning and importance on inevitable rejections they cause themselves to experience this type of social phobia. In order for them to conquer this social phobia they will have to confront their fears.

You can not hide your child and try to protect them. They will tell you that they will never be able to do this and that it is impossible. They may need to force themselves into public situations so that they can learn to handle them. Of course there will be times when they will need a push from you in order to get started. You should not automatically think that your child will need some type of medical intervention. If you take the time to work with your child you will be able to help them overcome their social phobia.…